Wednesday, August 22, 2007

My Abortion Story

by Pat Cabalse
While living in Philadelphia, I met this really nice young OB/GYN doctor and we fell in “love.” A few weeks later I was pregnant and he wanted nothing to do with either of us and wanted me to abort his child, saying it “would ruin his life.” As a single girl with no other person to turn to, I agreed.

Well, three months later, I put out extra food for my cat, swallowed about 200+ pills, including 2 kinds of narcotics, with a fair-sized bottle of wine to “sleep faster.” It was New Year’s Eve and I could no longer live with what I had done. I was a murderer – of my own child. I woke up in a hospital bed after CPR to restart my heart. I had bruises the size of footballs as no one had padded the bed side rails, 5 (locked with a key) leather restraints (on wrists, ankles and waist ) as they said I woke up with a lot of violence, and I had tubes in every opening of my body. Depression followed. I had changed from a young lady looking forward to a bright future to one locked away in a horrible secret place.

For the next 21 years, each time I met someone to say hello, my first thought was ALWAYS, “If she only knew who I was, she’d hate me!” That repeated in my mind over and over for 21 years. Not even God could forgive this! I named my baby Amy and never forgot her.

Then a miracle happened. My church had a weeklong retreat on “Returning to God” with confession available at the end of each day’s session. After the 4th day of the retreat, I slipped into the confessional and told the visiting priest about my abortion and 21 years of pain that followed. It was the first time I admitted out loud the secret I carried deep inside for so long. He asked me if I had ever confessed this before and I said no, that I was unable to do so. There was too much guilt and shame to say it out loud.

That night after the confession, I had the most wonderful dream. I saw a blinding bright light which turned out to be millions and millions of tiny bright babies (newborn- sized) dressed in blinding white robes, out of which a tiny light floated toward me. It was a tiny (full-term) baby with dazzling bright white hair, eyes, body, and clothing. She introduced herself to me, saying, “Hi, I’m Amy. I love you, Mommy.” And she thanked me for giving her a name. Amy told me she is happy in Heaven; that she doesn’t hate me, that she understands why I did what I did, that she loves me and I will see her some day. After the dream ended, I cried hard for several days – and the healing finally began.

Today, I am happily married to a wonderful man and we havetwo2 children and three grandchildren whom I love. My daughter is a single mom of a 4-year-old son, Kobe. She struggles at times and we help her, but she says with great joy that Kobe is THE best thing that ever happened to her. She’s a good, happy mom.

As for me, I have three children – two with me, and one in Heaven.


Pat Cabalse is one of the dedicated volunteers at HRTL

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Bev's Broadcast - HRTL Since Abortion #211

blessings
This is Beverly Larranaga of Hawaii Right to Life.

Since the tragic decision to legalize abortion in 1973, 46 million babies have been murdered thru various brutal and gruesome acts of abortion.

Since then, we have desensitized, sanitized and justified the killing of an unwanted baby with reasons such as:

-the baby would not have the care and love it needed,
-every baby should be wanted
-it’s for the babies own good
-after all it’s just a blob of protoplasm.

Since then, Hawaii Right to Life has been fighting to change that culture of death and disposable life, because, since way before then, the Bible says in Psalms 139:13.
“For you created my inmost being, you knit me together in my mother’s womb.”
If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and need more information call our office at 943-1595 or go to our web site at HRTL.

With Blessings,
This has been Beverly Larranaga of Hawaii Right to Life.